In the past few years, I have written notes which I shared with friends and family. The notes have largely reflected my internal conversations and some things I hoped to do in the year. I hope that a few of my thoughts will resonate with and spur the reader to some action.
2021 continued from where 2020 left off with the world still battling Covid-19. The world has not been the same since the pandemic started and sadly, at the time of this writing, it has claimed about 5.4 million lives globally. Every time we think that we are getting out of the woods, this horrible virus comes out in a new form (variant). As we head into 2022, I pray that your desires find fulfilment in the year. Here are some of my thoughts for the new year:
- Find your tribe: the Cambridge dictionary defines a tribe as “a group of people, often of related families, who live together, sharing the same language, culture, and history, especially those who do not live in towns or cities: a tribe of Amazonian Indians, the Masai tribe.” Informally, a tribe is “a large family or other group that someone belongs to.” In Acts 4:23, the Holy Bible tells about Peter and John going “back to their own people” after their encounter with the Sanhedrin (Read Acts 4 for full context).
All of us belong to a tribe because we all come from families and didn’t drop from the sky. Tribe in my context refer to those of your inner circle that you can absolutely rely on on sunny and rainy days? Do you belong to a tribe? Belonging to a tribe is a two-way street — you contribute to the tribe and you also take out of the tribe. A few weeks ago, I had an issue transferring funds to an account. After exhausting all avenues to sort the problem out on my own, I reached out to one of my tribes on WhatsApp and after explaining what my issue was, they took my problem as theirs and they reached out to their other tribes to find a resolution. During the Euro 2020 game between Denmark and Finland, Simon Kjaer played a pivotal role in ensuring Christian Eriksen did not die on the soccer pitch. After the incident, I wrote Perspectives where I mentioned that who you have in your corner (the tribe you belong to) during your down times could affect outcomes. In 2022 and beyond, find your tribe and make sure you are contributing to the tribe.
2. Be intentional: in 2022 and beyond, be intentional in doing the (positive and good) things you want to do. Being intentional means you are deliberate. It will help you to set time apart to pray, relax, research and take the steps needed to do the things you want to do.
Being intentional may mean setting reminders on your calendar to call your parent(s) or sibling(s) or friend. It may mean updating the settings on your devices to limit the time you spend on social media. Being intentional may mean finding an accountability partner or setting up a direct debit on your account to achieve your savings goal.
3. Listen more: we have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen more and talk less is a common saying. Practice active listening in 2022 — listen to understand and with full focus on whoever is speaking. Being a good listener will make you wiser and make you a better friend/colleague/spouse/parent, etc. I know what it feels like to not be heard and I am also guilty of not being a good listener. I have felt very good about myself and the person that listened to me the times I have been listened to. Be that person that can be counted on as a good listener.
4. Take risks (do it afraid): personally, I like predictable outcomes and/or knowing that one plus one will equal two. Life unfortunately is full of twists and turns and we will not always know what the outcome of a course of action will be. Being unsure of outcomes sometimes paralyzes us into inaction, which in itself is an action. One principle I have adopted is asking myself (or anyone asking my opinion about anything) some questions:
a. What if it fails?
b. What if it succeeds?
c. How will I (or you) know if I (or you) don’t try?
Of course, you need to know and understand your risk tolerance level or your risk appetite and this will guide what you do. My point is that doing some (legal) things afraid will be your first step. Do it and do it afraid if necessary. Things may not pan out as expected, but you will have grown and learned some lessons.
5. Define what success means to you: I have found myself thinking about this more lately. As humans, we may sometimes be inclined to look at our neighbor’s lawn and feel it is greener than ours. While it may be true, we may have no insights into what the neighbor has done to make their lawn greener and it could really be that our neighbor’s lawn is not greener than ours.
Defining what success means to you should make you secure in yourself and your achievements and will also help you in calibrating what you want to say yes or no to. It should also help you reduce comparing yourself with your friends or peers, most of whom you have no insights into what success means for them or what their life goals are.
6. Help someone who can’t pay you back: unfortunately, because fingers aren’t equal, there will always be some people that have it rough in life. Take time this year to do something for someone who you know won’t be able to repay you — buy food for that homeless person, pay someone’s school fees (if you’re in a position to), buy new shoes for that kid who could do with a new shoe, volunteer at a shelter, etc.
7. Set ambitious goals: set goals that will make you stretch you or make you ask yourself if you are crazy! “Aim for the moon and you may be lucky to land among the stars.” Setting ambitious goals and pursuing them will provide satisfaction and help you to grow in ways you may not have thought possible.
8. Learn to say no without feeling guilty: if you are like me, most times I don’t know how to say no to people’s requests without feeling guilty. Over the years I have realized that saying no is healthy and people will always find other ways of fulfilling their requests.
9. Develop yourself: something that may be a natural tag mate for setting ambitious goals will be self-development. Spend time and money improving your skills and knowledge. As has been said the greatest investment you can make is in yourself.
Your self-development efforts don’t necessarily have to relate to your work or career. You can learn to dance, sing, code (side eyeing myself). You can learn a new language, learn about a new culture, etc. Just do whatever you can to improve yourself.
10. Spend time with a child: I think everyone should spend a few minutes or hours with a child (of course with the consent of the parents and with the parents or guardians present). Spending time with a child will teach you curiosity, trust, innocence, forgiveness, sharing, etc. — these are some traits that we tend to lose as we grow up.
All the best in 2022 and cheers to successes and victories in the year!
